An old broad! I'm guessing that you're about my age, maybe a couple of years older. Besides 'broad' I like, dame, tomato, doll and gal but these days you've got to watch what you say.

And speaking of old jokes, here's an old Navy joke you may have heard.

The admiral's daughter was going to be married to another naval officer so her father took her aside the night before the wedding and said, "I know that you know what happens on your wedding night but since you're marrying a navy man I need to give you some advice. If your husband ever asks you to do it 'the other way' don't. Don't give in to him on this."

A couple of years go by and she is happy in her marriage but her father's words keep running through her head and she gets more and more curious.

Eventually, one night when she is in bed with her husband she can't control her curiosity any laniger and says to him, "Could we do it the other way?"

He replies, "What and fill the house with bloody kids!"